Sunday, January 11, 2009

Lost


How will you define being lost? Should it be one thing that you cannot find, something that you cannot have, someone you have no idea where they are? or you, standing in the middle of no where, confused on where you are and where you must be...


Well that is where i am right now, in the middle of no where, pretending to know this is my turf and my lair. Pretending that i know where i am and where to go, pretending that i am not lost. I was trying to choose from one point to another, much like being south then wanting to go for east or west. Imagine having 2 choices and thinking you had a million to choose from, that the pressure build up just made you quit and go for some "alone" time. That you know being alone leaves you vulnerable from any element of this God forsaken earth.

Happiness is one thing that no one can never have forever. Joy and happiness had the greatest difference in my life, and all the time i thought they are one and the same. Joy is when you felt secure, comfortable and loved by someone you like. Happiness on the other hand is when you feel fulfilled because you felt joy that someone needs you. I felt both and never bothered checking the difference and the balance of right and wrong. When you are overwhelmed with love, you will never bother knowing what you have until they are gone.

Blake said that it was better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. He may have never experienced loosing someone he loved and realizing the lose after they are gone. A saint said that someone that loves is infinite because love covers all multitude of sin, yet he never realized having to sin while trying to look for a love that was lost. Many great minds have tried speaking of love even before they experience the feeling of being lost from a love that was.

Being lost can be a hurdle for growth and at the same time an act of punishment. Being lost will open up your mind on finding ways to go to where you should be, blindfolded. You'll be traveling through unknown terrain that all you have is faith to bring you back to where you should be. Along the way, you realize that there are reason you need to find and answers to questions you have to ask...

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